I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
A+ Viking dick
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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