Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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