you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
