Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize