Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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