David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
YAS. BRING CRAB.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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