My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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