Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize