That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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