my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
