i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
