Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
