i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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