im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
