Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
