Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize