How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
