Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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