yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
