yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
