lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Swine flu. Run for my life!
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
