After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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