therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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