i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Its about making memories worth repressing
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
