why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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