took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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