yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
