Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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