So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
