that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I don't think brook has ever known best
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
