1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
