If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize