I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
