I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
two words...techno handjob
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
