using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
