you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize