He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
