The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
