apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
They have beer where we have blood.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
