let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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