I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
