At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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