Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i think i have two assholes
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
