THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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