Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
