how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
We are all done wearing pants today
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
