I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
