Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
