He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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