Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize