My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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