she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
